


Alpha Centauri Vacation

by ErikaWilliams



Category: Good Omens (TV)
Genre: Alpha Centauri (Good Omens), M/M, Misunderstandings, Plants, Post-Canon, Ye Saga Continues
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-11
Updated: 2020-05-11
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:55:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,596
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24133942
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ErikaWilliams/pseuds/ErikaWilliams
Summary: After the apocalypse that wasn't, Aziraphale and Crowley go on a vacation to Alpha Centauri's lone planet.
Relationships: Aziraphale/Crowley (Good Omens)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 23





	Alpha Centauri Vacation

_ We can run away together. Alpha Centauri! Lots of spare planets up there! At _ the time, it seemed like such a perfect idea. A nice, quiet place for him and Aziraphale to hide out together until the final battle between Heaven and Hell concluded. It didn’t matter who won. Once the victors discovered the two of them had been absent, they would scour the edges of the universe hunting them down.

Except the world hadn’t ended, and the final battle had been spectacularly avoided. Before Crowley had finished processing it all, Aziraphale suggested they go on vacation. Celebrate their newfound freedom. Crowley had been more than happy to oblige; even happier to let Aziraphale pick the destination. Of course, he was obligated to throw out a few helpful suggestions. Ones he was certain Aziraphale would turn down. He wanted Aziraphale to pick a place he wanted to visit.

France? They both had gone several times and not all of them were pleasant memories. Australia? The climate wasn’t very good that time of year. Aziraphale had to have somewhere in mind when he made the suggestion. Crowley just had to coax it out of him. After a few moments of silence, Aziraphale very slyly suggested Alpha Centauri. Crowley nearly ran the Bentley off the road.

Which was how Crowley had found himself here, seated on the cold, unforgiving ground of Alpha Centauri’s lone planet. He should have remembered there was only one planet in that star system. His knees were pulled close to his chest and his wings spread out behind him. Seated behind him, Aziraphale plucked parasites from his feathers. Crowley groaned and lowered his head to his arms as Aziraphale’s fingers ruffled through the feathers closest to his shoulder blades.

The first couple hours had been wonderful. Everything had started off so perfect. Nothing had happened upon their arrival. No smiting. No sudden retributions from either Heaven or Hell. No one watched them. For the first time since the start of time, they were well and truly alone. Even if someone had deciphered their trick, no one would think to look for them out there. The only problem he saw was figuring out what they should try first.

“Ngh,” Crowley grunted as Aziraphale plucked another pest from his wing. The sharp tug jerked him out of his reminiscence about how perfect that first walk had been with Aziraphale’s fingers entwined in his own.

“Almost done with the right wing, dear,” Aziraphale murmured as his fingers stroked through the feathers, shaking them gently.

“Did you do the left one yet?” he asked hopefully. He already knew the answer. He had been minutely aware of every touch of Aziraphale’s hands. No one had ever touched his wings before, and he didn’t think anyone else would touch them with such reverence.

“Not yet,” Aziraphale said before stroking his hands up Crowley’s coverts. Aziraphale was definitely not looking for pests with that motion. “Whatever were you thinking?”

“I was thinking we were having a nice little vacation, and I wanted to enjoy a small nap.” It was only a partial lie, just the part about it being a nice vacation. Aziraphale was enjoying the trip too much. He could tell how happy Aziraphale was with every soft smile, with every faint brush of his hand like he still couldn’t believe this was their reality now. He couldn’t bear to disappoint him by telling him he was miserable.  _ And _ he had really wanted the nap. He hadn’t wanted to risk the Bentley on alien terrain, so he had left it behind. Which meant they had been forced to walk and fly everywhere.

He wasn’t used to either option, but Aziraphale had been so exuberant while they had been flying. Aziraphale had taken his hands and smiled so brightly as to rival all the stars in the universe. Crowley couldn’t ask him to stop. So he had gotten tired. A silly mortal thing, really. But once he had gotten used to the luxuries of a soft bed with silk sheets and duck feather pillows, he found it hard to go without. After hours of flying, he needed that nap.

“Yes, but on your wings?” Aziraphale sighed as he moved his fingers to the soft down of his wings.

Crowley shivered at the touch. “The ground was hard,” he mumbled. He thought his wings would give him at least a little bit of cushion. Who knew this planet had pests that would burrow into the feathers? “Thought you were going to keep watch over me.”

“I got distracted,” Aziraphale said softly. The movement of his hands had changed subtly. It was less like he was searching for pests and more like he was moving his thumbs in gentle circles at the base of his wings. Felt almost like a massage.

He knew he was going to regret asking it. “By what?”

“I thought I saw something edible swimming in the water,” Aziraphale said so quietly that he wasn’t sure he heard him correctly. Aziraphale’s hands stilled in his wings and he rolled his shoulders, trying to get them moving again.

“You know, dear,” Aziraphale said as his hands started to busy themselves with preening his left wing. Some of those things were still squirming around in there. “If you’re uncomfortable, we could always go home.”

Out of the question. This trip was supposed to be for him and Aziraphale to celebrate their newfound freedom. He wasn’t about to cut it short just because he wanted to slip his feet into his nice cozy slippers. The soft, fuzzy ones. Tucked safely under his bed, they probably missed him as well.

“Wouldn’t dream of it, angel. People pay good money for this type of treatment back on Earth.” He practically purred as he flexed his wings back towards Aziraphale, an open invitation for him to keep going. The rest of the trip aside, this part was pure bliss. He closed his eyes and sighed. “Oww!” he yelped as pain raced through his wing. He could have sworn that Aziraphale had just pulled out half a dozen feathers.

“Sorry. That one was holding on rather tightly.” Something small and round went flying past his head and into the silvery water. At least one feather fell to the ground next to him. So much for that exquisite bonding experience. Aziraphale hurried through the rest of his feathers, plucking out parasites with much less care than he had before.

“Is that plant moving closer to us?” Aziraphale asked as he removed his hands from Crowey’s wings.

He side-eyed the plant in question. When he had started his nap, there had been no plants in the immediate vicinity. He had checked. There was something odd about the plants here. They all had spots. They were always watching him. Waiting for their moment to strike.

“Maybe we should see what’s on the other side of the lake?” Crowley suggested. He didn’t want to see what would happen when one of those plants caught up to him.

~*~*~

How many Earth days had they been up there? It was difficult to judge time on an alien planet. Had he locked the bookshop up before they left? He had just gotten everything back. It would be absolutely dreadful to lose it all to some petty thieves now.

It was night on Alpha Centauri, as far as he could tell although the nights were far brighter here. They sat together at the top of a hill, the alien landscape stretching out below and the starry sky above. He looked up, hoping to catch even a glimpse of the Big Dipper, or Orion, or… Well, he hadn't learned any constellations. What he wouldn’t give to see any of them now. Instead he turned to watch Crowley as he stared adamantly at the stars. At least Crowley had the good sense to keep his wings tucked safely away this time.

The night was quiet. They had found no wildlife beyond the parasites. There were no subtle sounds of humanity as a backdrop to the evening. No laughter, no crying, no talking. No music. He never realized before how much he would miss music. He would have settled for any music at the moment, even that stuff that Crowley preferred. They were completely and utterly alone.

He inched closer to Crowley until their shoulders barely brushed up against one another. It helped to ease the loneliness, even if the silence remained overbearing. He still had Crowley. He would always have Crowley. Though at the moment, he would much prefer to have Crowley back on Earth.

Other than walk around and enjoy each other’s company, there wasn’t much to do on Alpha Centauri. He couldn’t ask Crowley to go home. Oh sure, he could, and he could look at Crowley in just the right way that Crowley would oblige, just like he always did. Crowley would whisk them back to Earth in an instant. And then… and then Crowley would always remember that Aziraphale was the one who cut their trip short. It wouldn’t be a very auspicious start to this next phase of their relationship. Crowley might start to rethink some things about the two of them.

“I brought you something,” Crowley said quietly.

“Really?” He didn’t remember Crowley bringing any bags with them. He supposed Crowley might have slipped something small into his jacket pocket. There were a number of things that might fit. A candy bar? A piece of jewelry? No, that would be moving a little too fast, wouldn’t it? They had just sorted out the whole apocalypse business.

“I thought you might get hungry.” Oh, so it wasn’t some type of jewelry then. Crowley reached into his pocket and pulled out something in a foil packet.

“Really, dear, you shouldn’t have,” Aziraphale said with a small smile as Crowley extended the packet towards him. He wasn’t familiar with the brand name, but he ripped it open to reveal some dehydrated green thing with brown specks in it. “What is it?” he asked, unsure if he and Crowley had different definitions of food.

“It’s space ice cream.”

What was in that foil packet bore no resemblance to ice cream. Still, Crowley was looking at him expectantly, so he took a bite, just a small one from the corner. He nearly choked. “I’ll save the rest for later,” he said, placing the rest in his pocket. Crowley grumbled something incomprehensible and looked away.

He couldn’t live up there forever. Having Crowley all to himself had been rather pleasant, but he couldn’t stay like that forever. He needed books and music and sushi and the Bentley so he didn’t have to walk everywhere. Honestly, he had been alarmed when Crowley hadn’t requested to leave after the parasite incident. Those things had left painful looking bite marks all through Crowley’s wings. Crowley seemed quite content with spending time on Alpha Centauri. If things carried on the way they were, Crowley might never want to go back to Earth. But his Bentley was there, and his plants. Crowley had to want to go back. Didn’t he? But before Armageddon hadn’t happened Crowley had been perfectly content to come out here with only Aziraphale for company. The least he could do for him was to endure two weeks. Something brushed up against his shoulder, but he resolutely ignored it. There had to be some way to get Crowley back to Earth without hurting his feelings.

“Urgk.”

He hadn’t heard that noise before, even though he had a mental catalog of all the noises Crowley had made through the centuries. Everything was so boring and predictable on Alpha Centauri. He turned towards Crowley, or rather what he could still see. One of the plants had engulfed Crowley's top half.

“Excuse you, get off him,” he instructed, giving the plant a firm rap on the stalk. The plant retreated, leaving behind a very drenched demon and a pair of destroyed sunglasses. The plant seemed to hiss at them, and he pulled Crowley up and behind him.

“You can’t have him,” he told the plant that snapped angrily at the air in front of him. He wasn’t about to let a plant that had a fancy for the taste of Crowley intimidate him. He stared the plant down and with a final growl in their direction, it started to slink away. “Are you alright?” he asked, turning to Crowley and grabbing both of his hands in his. The sunglasses were a lost cause, and Crowley wouldn’t have any extras with him, but otherwise he seemed unscathed.

“I’m fine,” Crowley said throwing the tattered remains of his sunglasses to the ground. Normally he would lecture him about littering, but quite frankly the planet deserved it. “Those plants are going to have to try harder than that if they want their revenge.”

“What revenge?” Crowley had never given him any indication that he had been there before.

“Nothing. I'm having a great time.”

“Maybe we should consider going back to Earth.”

“No! I’m not about to let some homicidal plant ruin our hon---vacation. We just need to get somewhere else.”

“Like back to Earth?” he suggested hopefully. Where there were humans and food and transportation and books and bug spray.

“There are plenty of other things to do here. Preferably things away from those plants.”

“It’s not just the plants, Crowley,” Aziraphale said, giving Crowley’s hands a light squeeze. “What about the parasites? How could I possibly enjoy myself when you’ve been having such a rough time?”

“I’m having a great time, angel. I’m here with you.”

“Yes, but we can be together on Earth.” And they would be a lot more comfortable and he wouldn’t have to worry about the local flora and fauna harassing Crowley. Except for the ducks. The ducks weren't always fond of Crowley. “And we can do things like go on picnics and go to museums and listen to music.”

“It is kind of boring here, isn’t it?” Crowley asked, looking at the vast emptiness surrounding them.

“Let’s go home, Crowley,” he said, pulling Crowley closer to him.

“Alright, if you insist,” Crowley said despondently. What was he playing at, trying to make him feel bad? Crowley had to be even more miserable than him. And had likely been pushing through parasites and homicidal plants because he hadn’t wanted to ruin their first vacation together. Oh.

“Wait.” He pulled firmly on Crowley’s hands to keep him from taking off too soon. “Before we leave, there is one more thing I’d like to try with you that would make this trip perfect.”

“Don’t delude yourself, angel. There isn’t anything that could even make this trip good.”

He opted to ignore that comment and instead leaned forward to gently kiss Crowley. Crowley tasted faintly like cinnamon and the very thought made his stomach grumble. He buried it deep and tried to focus instead on the way Crowley softened under his lips. Like ice cream melting in his mouth on a hot summer’s day. He pulled away from Crowley with a low moan. They should probably be headed back to Earth soon before he started behaving like that plant and decided that Crowley looked like a particularly tasty morsel.

“I stand corrected,” Crowley said looking a little dazed and swaying on his feet. “That’s a,” Crowley cleared his throat, “that’s a nice way to end a, uh, vacation.”

“Yes, well, if you’re very good and take us home right now, maybe we can end dinner tonight that way as well.”

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Written for the Ye Saga Continues Zine, which you can support [here](https://yesagacontinues.bigcartel.com/).


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